Falcons Forum

With an average game attendance this year of 10.3 players per game, Falcons Human Resource Director Timmy has compiled the top ten reasons for the high Absenteeism this year.

10. I had to donate a kidney (this is a one-time excuse)
9. I had to donate blood.
8. The Lyndebrook Creek ferry wasn't running today.
7. I dropped a beer bottle on my foot.
6. My wife is reading Fifty Shades of Grey
5. I got the pox.
4. I'm in China
3. I have an unidentifiable rash.
2. My muskles hurt.
1. I am helping my dog through his sexual identity crisis.